Blogs

Here’s a guest Plog from Gina Kaufmann, the Pitch’s former calendar editor and SeeSaw columnist.

A moment of silence, please.

Mott-ly died yesterday. He wouldn’t want more than a moment of your silence. But that one moment? He deserves it.

I met Mott-ly five or six years ago. He didn’t mention that he was an artist. He was a nice guy in a wheelchair who had great taste in everything and such a pleasant disposition that I forgot he was sick most of the time.

The Seattle Post-Intelligencer ran this Memorial Day story about the prospect of the NBA’s Supersonics leaving – and possibly coming to Kansas City. Summing up what this would mean for Seattle, the paper offered:

If the Sonics should go -- and privately many people close to the situation expect exactly that -- there are a few things the Emerald City should expect: a negligible economic impact; a long, wistful hoops hangover; and no replacement team for a generation at the earliest.

A “negligible economic impact”? So, why do we want an NBA team?

Meanwhile, The Kansas City Star's Jeffrey Flanagan has already begun calling the team the Kansas City Supersonics. Considering how we were treated by the Kansas City Penguins, here's hoping Flanagan's comment doesn't become a jinx. – Eric Barton

Here's something you probably didn't see this weekend: the Muscle Mayhem Championships at the Folly Theater.

SPOILER ALERT: According to Mark 3:29, “Whoever blasphemes against the Holy Spirit will never be forgiven; he is guilty of an eternal sin.” It’s the one "Calvin Pissing" window decal God won’t overlook.

At blasphemychallenge.com, the Rational Response Squad – which is kind of like the theological equivalent of the Committee to Fire Katie Horner – is offering a free copy of atheist documentary The God Who Wasn’t There to anyone willing to verbally denounce the Holy Spirit on video and upload it to YouTube.

In the edgy, denunciatory spirit of blaspheming the Holy Ghost, here is a Memorial Day Weekend guide composed as a list of other people I, Chris, deny for all eternity.

Last night, I put on plastic skeleton earrings and went with a big group of friends to the Cinemark Palace on the Plaza to see the third movie in the Pirates of the Caribbean trilogy: At World’s End. I was hoping the third part of the Johnny-Depp-driven series would make up for No. 2, Dead Man’s Chest, which, besides some cool special effects, sucked big hairy pirate balls.

No such luck.

5:25 p.m. An unidentified toddler dances across the Drepung Gomang Monastery's mandala before being hustled out of Union Station by a woman, presumably the child's mother. Two days' worth of intricate sand painting is decimated in seconds, forcing eight visiting Tibetan monks to begin their task again.

5:45 p.m. Construction workers see the toddler enter the Sprint Center construction site. The toddler discovers a Zamboni hidden under a tarp and pushes it into a freshly dug sewer tunnel. The mother's car is seen peeling away; the child surfs behind it on a skateboard, holding on to a pink-and-blue rope.

5:58 p.m. Security cameras capture images of the toddler entering the Library Lofts.

6:11 p.m. Security cameras record the toddler leaving the Library Lofts with a 52-inch TV, three Nintendo Wii game consoles and a bottle of Hennessy.

6:19 p.m. The toddler attempts to deface Mayor Mark Funkhouser's car with a set of plastic toy keys. The passenger-side door falls off.

6:27 p.m. Workers flee the site of the Kauffman Center for the Performing Arts as the toddler approaches. The kid alters blueprints with crayon to include a moat, a dragon pit and four magic towers. Speculation builds that the child's grandmother is Kay Barnes.

6:35 p.m. The toddler stops at Mercy Seat and asks to see designs for "Fwee Twibet."

-- Scott Wilson

The Kansas City Star reports that the Supersonics are in very, very preliminary talks about moving, possibly to Kansas City. We know we've been abused before by moving teams -- we're talking to you, Pittsburgh. But just in case, here are some reasons we'd like to see the Kansas City Supersonics:

10. Using an umlaut to spell Mickaël Gelabale.

9. Jesus Shuttlesworth is coming to town (Sonics guard Ray Allen starred in He Got Game).

8. Squatch!

7. Gives us a reason to play that song “Supersonic,” by overlooked 1980's girl-group J.J.Fad (the original song, not the one by Fergie).

6. Something to be excited about now that baseball season is already over. Oh, it isn’t? Damn.

5. Robert Swift will automatically be the ugliest man in KC.

4. Former Jayhawk Nick Collison can come back and hit on chicks at all his old Lawrence hangouts.

3. We don’t have to take back the Kings.

2. Sonics legend Shawn Kemp can visit his alleged illegitimate children in KC.

1. No fucking hockey!

-- Justin Kendall and Nadia Pflaum

It has been banned by YouTube and may be the subject of a copyright lawsuit. Well, now watch the Westboro Baptist Church take on “We Are the World,” titled “God Hates the World.”

Not many people can count a convicted killer on their MySpace buddies list, but there are at least 32 people who have Byron Case.

Case is serving a life sentence in Cameron for the 1997 murder of Anastasia WitbolsFeugen. But he has, for the most part, the average profile of any Hot Topic-wearing, Cure-loving goth kid. His MySpace page, titled Monochrome, indicates that he likes David Lynch films, listens to Skinny Puppy and reads Philip K. Dick. He must get cable TV in his cell, because he’s a fan of The Colbert Report and Mythbusters, both shows that hit the airwaves after his May 2002 conviction.

It’s Case’s MySpace blog that makes his profile interesting.

Beth Gottstein leads the competition for New Kansas City Council Member Most Likely to Say Something Strange.

At the May 17 business session, consultants presented an analysis of economic development in Kansas City. The analysis included examples of the tools other cities in the U.S. use to foster growth.

The consultants discussed their findings for about 30 minutes. Then Mayor Funkhouser opened up the discussion.

This weekend, let's GO TO THE LIBRARY! On our bikes! Right after tonight's superamazing HIGH FIVE CONTEST! After the jump, a number of weekend events we found interesting.

Mayoral spokesman Joe Miller called recently with corrections to this Plog item from May 11. That article listed the donors to Mayor Mark Funkhouser’s inaugural gala. We got the list from City Hall, but Miller said there were two errors on it.

First, the name of the contact at the lawfirm Blackwell Sanders, one of the $10,000 donors, was incorrect. It’s actually David A. Fenley.

Second – and this gets interesting – the Greater Kansas City Chamber of Commerce was not a donor, although they were listed as being in for $10,000. Miller explained that the Chamber erroneously landed on the list because it had done another favor for Funkhouser. And this one’s a lot better than simply putting in some dough for a party.

Get ready for this unholy showdown: fag-hating Fred Phelps and King of Pop Michael Jackson.

The two are colliding over copyright infringement thanks to the Westboro Baptist Church's parody of “We Are the World,” which the Phelpses sing as “God Hates the World.”

Next month, the 2007 Tony Awards – named for the late actress and director Antoinette Perry (1888-1946) – will be presented at the historic Radio City Music Hall and aired on CBS. The event honors excellence in New York City’s theater community.

In July, the 2007 Zoey Awards – named for the very-much-alive veteran Kansas City femme illusionist Zoe Kelly – will be presented at the historic Athenaeum at 900 East Linwood Avenue. The event honors, according to Ms. Kelly, “all aspects of Kansas City’s gay community, including best bar owner and best male vocalist.”

According to published reports, Kansas City-based Hallmark has discovered three previously unknown emotions that can be captured in greeting cards.

They're: requiapathy, "the combination of relief and guilt that comes with the sudden realization that you no longer miss a dead loved one"; seprudity, "the feeling of appreciating a coworker's dedication without fully understanding his or her job function"; and trepatiousness, "a synthesis of rage and jealousy, though more muted and often accompanied by a sensation of weightlessness."

At this point, we should mention that this news came courtesy of The Onion. Read more here.

We know that this news isn't exactly real. But it's funny because we've been feeling requiapathy over the death of Jerry Falwell.