Kansas City News Blog

By JASON HARPER

The following press release wafted in on an e-breeze lightly scented with the cigarette smoke of days past and the tang of copper bar railing.

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Bar Talk

There have been rumors floating around about Dave's Stagecoach Inn recently. To set the record straight: the bar has not been sold, the bar has not closed, and, although we remain diversity-friendly, Dave's has not become a gay bar.

Our outdoor sign was taken down for repair after a city truck damaged it last winter. We hope to have it back up--with all the lights working--very soon.

Yes, the smoking ban has put a huge dent in our business just as it has with many area bars. Although the temporary injunction was removed, the lawsuit we are part of is still under review in the courts. In the meantime, we are working on building a patio in the back and would like to thank those loyal customers who continue to support us.

John Yuelkenbeck

Read on to find out what misadventures prompted this letter.

Actually, what prompted part-time bartender and jukebox proprietor John Y's letter was basically a snowballing of rumors spread by assholes, compounded by the removal of the sign for repair two or three weeks ago. On top of that, business has slowed due to the smoking ban and also, Yuelkenbeck thinks, because a large portion of the bar's clientele comprises service industry people, who've been hit especially hard by the slumping economy.

We at The Pitch love Dave's and are sad to hear these Lamentations of Yuelkenbeck, so we encourage all drinkers to hit the S'coach for a nice, long happy hour sometime soon -- enjoy the clean air, the cheap drinks and the best jukebox in town.

Maybe it's time to pick up that Dave's T-shirt you've been meaning to get for gramps. Currently available are the "I'm the one you gotta blow to get a drink around here" and "Dipsomania!" designs, the latter of which is Yuelkenbeck's pride and joy.

"It's probably my favorite one I've ever done," he says. "It's like a medical term for alcoholism, but we make it sound glamorous, like a Broadway show."

And the show must go on.