Kansas City News Blog

Codependent, oversized novelty Mayor Mark Funkhouser (as blog roommate Chris Packham would identify him) and his conjoined wife, Gloria Squitiro, made Kansas City the capitol city of "love in the workplace" (ew) when they appeared on Good Morning America this morning.

An animated Diane Sawyer quizzed Funkhouser and Squitiro via satellite from their Brookside home. Funkhouser gave the usual answers about this being a 24-7 job, and repeated his claim that lots of hubbies and wives work together.


"The whole thing about Gloria really doesn't amount to a hill of beans," Funkhouser told Sawyer. "It's just really an attempt to slow and block change. People don't like change, and they're using this as a distraction to kind of slow things up."

Squitiro's explanation was a little bit stranger. See, she's an Italian from Long Island, New York, "and that's a little different to the more reserved people here in Kansas City."

See, Kansas City. We're just not sophisticated enough to understand the ways of Gloria Squitiro.

"You call them beige people?" Sawyer asked, clearly mishearing Squitiro.

"Reserved."

"Heh, heh. Reserved people," Sawyer said.

"What about this lawsuit, talking about racially insensitive remarks including an African-American woman in the office being called 'mammy'?" asked Sawyer, whose face slowly contorted in an effort to look disgusted.

"I have never used a racial slur in my life," Squitiro said. "I was not raised to use derogatory words."

For much of the interview, Funkhouser sat stiff and silent as Squitiro did the talking. But the Funk chimed in at the end. "I think Kansas City wants a stand-up guy who sticks with what he believes in."

Basically, Funkhouser and Squitiro just told us to "deal."

KMBC also has the uncut interview.

-- Justin Kendall