Kansas City News Blog

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Five fearless souls snared themselves a Tyrannosaurus Rex in front of Union Station Monday afternoon. They look pretty nonchalant for being in the presence of one of the most deadly creatures to ever roam the earth (not to mention one we thought was extinct). No word of casualties, and it's not clear what these heroic hunters will do with their catch (although there may be answers at Thursday's "Dino Daze" at the Station).

Update: The T-Rex is promoting Union Station's next big exhibit, "Dinosaurs Unearthed," with 24 animatronic dinos (eight of which are feathered). They've dubbed the show "the largest collection of feathered fossil replicas on display outside of China," and it starts May 1. Tickets go on sale April 9.

Grand Avenue Temple: The non-homeless are welcome, too!

​Downtown Kansas City is experiencing a revival in the literal sense.

Earlier this month, Church Executive magazine (what, you don't keep up?) ran a story about the decision made by United Methodist Church of the Resurrection, the Leawood-based megachurch, to open a campus at the Grand Avenue Temple.

Methodists have worshiped at Grand and East Ninth since 1866. The Grand Avenue Temple congregation dwindled over time, however. In its later years, the church existed mainly to serve the needy.

Church of the Resurrection hired a young guy, Dan Brooks, to make Grand Avenue Temple something else besides a soup kitchen.

Leopards are predators, which makes this spotted Prius more intimidating than your average hybrid car.

​What's tackier than wearing a Snuggie in public? Painting your car so that it looks like it's wearing one. I spotted this leopard-print Toyota Prius in the parking lot of a Borders in Olathe. Not being an expert on animal camouflage, at first I thought the car had Cheetah spots. (Come to think of it, given the recent controversy surrounding the tendency for Toyota cars to speed unstoppably, maybe painting them like the world's fastest animal would actually be a public service.) But after a little Google image searching, I've concluded that these outlined spots are the mark of a leopard. Rawr.

A disgruntled customer started a Web site calling Lewis Benson a "Craigslist Scammer."

​Stupid Internet.

"Andrew" does online marketing for a living and recently started dabbling in real estate. He estimates he's spent $20,000 in repairs on a house in the Northeast that he hopes to flip. Via Craigslist, he hired a contractor named Lewis Benson to do some work on the home's exterior. He paid Benson $1,400. Afterward, Andrew couldn't track down Benson for three working days via phone or e-mail. He suspected a scam. So Andrew did what any average hipster with Web-savvy friends would do -- he created a site to destroy Benson's reputation.

One man, two snakes.

​Most of the other statues around me have their pee-pees covered with bronze leaves or diaper-like drapes -- but not me! Some of Kansas City's most powerful men hang out around me. They like to look at paintings of important buildings that have been erected around town. And they like to suck cigars, good ones like Arturo Fuentes that sell for $10 each.

It doesn't appear as if anyone around me reads The Pitch, but there's a copy of the Kansas City Business Journal and The Independent lying on a dark wood table.

OK, everyone: Guess where I am.

Bluford branch manager Oliver Clark (far left) smiles as library director Crosby Kemper III (cheering) cuts the ribbon on the new location.

​The Bluford branch of the Kansas City Public Library used to be a pretty depressing place. The building sits across the street from a dying strip mall with cracked windows and vacant storefronts. Tucked between Prospect and Wabash, it faces a row of dilapidated houses begging for demolition. Inside, the drab design contained as much color and atmosphere as a run-down dentist's office.

But, now that the $1.3 million renovation is complete, Bluford should make Brooksiders who frequent the posh Plaza branch envious of folks on the East Side.

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Depending on which Jesus this billboard along 71 Highway refers to -- lord baby Jesus? Jesus on the cross? -- this either qualifies as an "Amber Alert" or a "Silver Alert." But Jesus is missing. So if you've seen a guy wearing a crown of thorns or turning water into wine at Chez Charlie or in the usual place -- in Cheeto (Cheesus), a baby scan or a granite slab -- let us know.

Charley Morasch, quit stuffing your American government packets in our boxes.

​Evolution hatin' Charley Morasch has an important message for America, so either he (or some passionate fan of his) has addressed the people through the most powerful means possible: stuffing a shitty pamphlet into the Pitch box in front of the Half Price Books on Metcalf. This is the modern equivalent of nailing theses to the church door.

The pamphlet, credited to Morasch and titled "American Government Supplemental Mini-Course," proves once and for all that some of America's founding fathers were big on this Jesus guy.

It also reveals that our heathen public schools don't tell the kids this, and that this is a terrible crime, and that the kids need to stop reading Beezus & Ramona or tracing hand-turkeys or whatever and instead memorize that one thing John Quincy Adams said that one time.

A new art display has replaced the "Look" bicycle art on Main Street.

​The snow and sleet got the best of the multicolored "LOOK" bicycle at the corner of 43rd and Main streets. But with the (hopefully) soon-changing season comes a new piece of bike-inspired art at this busy intersection.

See the new art after the jump.

The Kansas City police's in-car cameras often capture frightening and bizarre videos. This isn't one of them. Chief Jim Corwin writes on his blog that officers on patrol are asked to make sure their dash cams are working before their shifts begin -- and here's a nice reminder to make sure the camera is working. Courtesy of the chief, we present the dancing cop.

No one can argue that the Kansas City Public Library isn't one of the coolest places in the city. That's partly because of the majestic building itself, a century-old marble bank rehabbed to glory in 2004. The library's also cool because of the massive Community Bookshelf sculpture along the south side of the award-winning parking garage. And then there's this excellent use of the space between that garage and the sidewalk:
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Providing such amenities is a great way to encourage people and their pets to live downtown! Especially when there are fun and witty details like this little pretend fire hydrant just for dogs:
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All anyone asks of urban dwellers is that they please pick up after their dogs.
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But, aw, jeez, it looks like a lot of dog walkers aren't doing their duty.

Corinna West

​It was fitting that Corinna West loaded her bicycle with camping gear and started her frigid 162-mile journey to from Kansas City to Missouri's capital on the first day of the winter Olympics.

After all, she's an Olympian herself -- and cycling helped her get to the Games.

While training at the U.S. Olympic Center in Colorado Springs as part of the American judo team in the 1990s, West commuted everywhere on two wheels. That cross-training, she says, gave her a leg up on her competition. She dreamed of a gold medal at the 1996 summer games in Atlanta; she was crushed when she placed 15th in the world.

Then, a few years later, in graduate school at the University of Missouri-Kansas City, West was diagnosed with schizophrenia, a brain disorder that often includes auditory hallucinations and difficulty discerning what's real and imagined. "There came a place where I thought I couldn't have a career as scientist and I couldn't have a successful family," she says. "I gave up on my dreams and, being a really ambitious person, it was such a discouraging state that I was really sick for a long time."

Connecting with other cyclists and becoming an advocate for alternative transportation acted as stepping stones back to a healthy lifestyle. But on Saturday morning, she and her partner, Brian Gallmeyer, took a leap that some might call crazy: They started a three-day ride that ends today at the state capitol in Jefferson City.

KC Wolf tells the kids to save the scoring until marriage.

​Kansas City Chiefs mascot KC Wolf is the featured speaker at an abstinence-only rally Saturday night in Raymondville, Missouri. 

Dan Meers, the sheep inside the wolf skin, is speaking at a youth rally called True Love Waits, and you can pretty much guess what they're all about.

KC Wolf is just in time given that we're in the middle of prime wolf-mating months.

The going rate to have KC Wolf tell your kid to keep it in his pants is anywhere from $150 (a 5 to 10 minute "shock and awe" visit) to $250 (for the birthday party your kid will never forget). Oh, and a school program will cost you $325.

If anyone is used to not scoring, it's KC Wolf.

Hat tip to KC Chiefs Blog.

Photo from KCChiefs.com.

​Lawrence T-shirt shop Joe College is now hawking T-shirts that might make Kansas State basketball coach Frank Martin's blood boil.

The shirts say "Frank Martin mows my lawn," you know, because Martin's parents were Cuban immigrants. The privilege of wearing one goes to anyone dumb enough willing to shell out $15.95 (to look like a doucher).

So would you buy one?



Hat tip to Bottom Line.

Joel Rhodes

​Joel Rhodes, Ph.D., an associate professor of history at Southeast Missouri State University, recently sent The Pitch an e-mail asking that readers contact him with their personal stories of the 1960s. Sure, Doc. First, though, he answered a few questions himself in an e-mail exchange.

The Pitch: Why the '60s, which feels familiar and widely portrayed already?

Rhodes: I see my job as trying to put some historical perspective on the "1960s." My first book, The Voice of Violence, looked at less well-known radical groups in the Midwest (places like Lawrence and Kansas City) in an attempt to get away from the misperception that the '60s only happened in Berkeley, Chicago, Ann Arbor and Woodstock. This new book is another step down that path, another attempt to look at the Vietnam era from points of view that haven't already been analyzed by historians and the media. No one has ever approached "the '60s" through the eyes of the 57 million kids who were born between 1956 and 1970. The stories of how this generation understood the historical forces of "the sixties" as children -- and any impact this unique perspective has had on them as adults -- is virtually uncharted territory for historians.

In collecting these recollections I'm relying initially on the calling card of nostalgia (Kennedy, Vietnam, hippies, etc.), but I'm hopeful that as people ponder their childhood during the era they'll dig much deeper. Over the next couple of years I'll weave their recollections into a history of social change in the '60s. ... I hope to collect thousands of personal recollections and my guess is that the stories themselves will take the book into wonderful directions that I don't yet anticipate.

"White Owl" Jimmy Neil Tucker

​Bad news for the grandpa-chasing hippie chicks of the University of Kansas.

Jimmy Neil Tucker, known as the Jayhawks' third-string mascot White Owl, pleaded no contest to charges that he violated a protection order and was sentenced to a year of probation and barred from returning to the KU campus, according to the Lawrence Journal-World.

This is undoubtedly is a major distraction for Bill Self's Jayhawks heading into tonight's Border Showdown War rivalry game with Missouri.

In November, the man caged the 62-year-old in the Douglas County jail after allegedly no-showing a court date on charges that he violated a protect order in September -- taken out by his ex-, a 23-year-old KU student.

Topeka-based Westboro Baptist Church continues to spread hate across the land, especially for goofy pop star Lady Gaga. WBC's Megan Phelps-Roper parodies Gaga's "Poker Face" in the video below, which is maybe a step above mall-kiosk quality.



Here's the original (damn that's a big dog).


Meh, Cartman's is still the best.

​James Tharp, the restless businessman who in the 1980s designed and built a one-of-a-kind hilltop home overlooking downtown Kansas City, Missouri, died January 3. According to his Kansas City Star obituary, he was 66 and lived in Mission.

In late 2006, on the eve of the upside-down-L-shaped house's demolition to make way for million-dollar homes, Tharp (who sold the property in 2001) told The Pitch a couple of stories about his time there. In the mid-1990s, for example, then-President Bill Clinton noticed the house while motorcading along Interstate 35:

"We raised the blinds and turned on all the lights, and I waved my arm," Tharp says. He happened to know the congressman sharing the car with the commander in chief. "Then the phone rings, and President Clinton says, 'That's the craziest thing I ever saw.' "

Even now, the everyday I-35 commuter may glance up toward Jefferson Street and forget for an instant that the house is gone. Tharp, though, was comfortable with his -- and his house's -- legacy. As he told The Pitch in 2006:

"Sure, people will probably remember it longer than I live, but I'm not too concerned about it. It's just not my business anymore. I'm somewhere else. I got one-and-three-quarter acres in Mission with a creek running through it and deer that come on the lot, so I went from the highest to lowest."

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Meet B-Lizard, the latest snow creation from Danny J. Gibson, also known around KC as DJG (2003 Best Of winner for Best Fliers). DJG sent along the above photo of B-Lizard in his front yard at the corner of West 40th Street and Holly.

"Last Wednesday, the snow was perfect for packing as a guy could roll up the yard like carpet," DJG tells The Pitch. "B-Lizard took me about two and a half hours."

B-Lizard isn't DJG's first snow creation. In 2007, he made a giant snow bunny. In 2008, it was a massive snow kitty. 2009's creation was a "stegosnowus."

"What I love about snow creating is that it gives me the opportunity to not only share something with the community on a wide level, but also to give something away," DJG writes "That 'something' is in terms of creativity, inspiration and the fact that the art will eventually go away. It is also so nice to share. I just hope I can keep it up as my body shows it's age for a week after ... and I'm relatively still young! I hope others are inspired to realize that anybody can do this, on any level, as creativity and imagination is limitless, is all around us and can even be found in the front yard."

I, for one, would like to welcome our new snow lizard overlords.

After the jump, more shots of B-Lizard, courtesy of DJG.

Director Kevin Smith hasn't given up on his attempted conversion of Megan Phelps-Roper, the gay-hating granddaughter of Fred Phelps, via Twitter.

Phelps-Roper reached out first with a tweet about her Lady Gaga parody.

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Smith read between the lines.

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And he had a proposition.

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Guessing that's frowned upon in the Phelps' house.

Phelps-Roper was unfazed.

"Uncle" Ed Muscare

​Former children's show host and 77-year-old registered sex offender "Uncle" Ed Muscare is scheduled to be sentenced Wednesday, January 6, for violating his probation by using the Internet and moving to South Carolina without notifying the sheriff's department, according to an Orlando television station.

Here's video from an Orlando TV station WKMG of Muscare arguing that sex offenders deserve second chances, although he does say, "I would never sexually offend again, but we can't help but sin. We're all human beings."

Real reassuring.

"Uncle" Ed had been posting bizarre videos to YouTube, including him singing "Pretty Woman" and letting a dog suckle on his bare stomach.

Muscare was arrested in 1986 for molesting a 14-year-old Florida boy. Since, he's reportedly had trouble registering as a sex offender.

In the TV interview, Muscare explains that he didn't register because neighbors would harass him so he "hid successfully in South Carolina, until one day the deputy sheriff showed up" and arrested him.

cyclelicio.us

​After yesterday's new snow fell, the Missouri Department of Transportation and Kansas City, Missouri, didn't plow residential streets or treat roads with de-icer. It was too cold, officials said. Besides, they added, Sunday's dusting would offer a little traction on KC's ice-rink-like sidestreets. Riiiiight.

That translates to: You're on your own, Kansas Citians. So you can work your own streets in whatever vehicle can be adapted, or you can mix up your own chemical solution. All you need is some magnesium chloride (which works at a lower temperature than the usual salt) and the Minnesota Snow and Ice Control Handbook (PDF here). You won't even have to get outside if you hire a KCMO School District student. The kids are off today because it's too cold to learn.

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I said it earlier this year, and I'll say it again: Someone must have hurt Jason Whitlock real bad. After a year of "strange tang," "pussy galore," "oozing pumpkins" and "stuffed onions," it's hard not to conclude that The Kansas City Star's butterball of bitterness is hurting on the inside.

Whitlock played weight watcher and criticized Serena Williams' badunkadunk. He excused cheating athletes' indiscretions because all athletes just want some "strange tang." He even laid out who deserved a mistress. In one of his finer moments, Whitlock mused about finding "a blossoming May flower" to "fertilize into a special, 28-year-old bouquet."  It'd be easy to wish a big-breasted Krampus upon Whitlock, but during his holiday season, it's hard not to feel a bit of mercy. So big-boobied Krampus, go easy on J-dub. I kinda like him.

Bill Threatt ... meet Krampus

​Kids in the United States have a sanitized view of Santa Claus. Sure, he allegedly makes a list dividing the naughty from the nice, but, practically speaking, the only punishment for greedy little brats is not getting the latest PlayStation Whatever.

European folklore is far different. For children in countries like Germany and Austria, Old Saint Nick has a terrifying companion who kicks ass and takes names. Krampus, a creepy demon with goatlike horns and mangy hair, doesn't care if you're 5 years old. If you're making life miserable for your mom, have fun nursing the welts from your birch-stick beating in hell, kiddo.

This Christmas, we decided to get in the holiday spirit by making our own list of Kansas City residents -- ones who could use a visit from an evil ghoul instead of a jolly dude in a red suit.

The first target: William Threatt Jr., former president of the Community Development Corporation of Kansas City.

KMBC's Joel Nichols is this storm's champion predictor

​Every year 'round this time, amateur weather watchers tee-off against their local meteorologists, weather girls and professional Doppler junkies. They criticize everything from the blase "There could be some snow in the metro" to the alarmist, a-snowflake-is-a-blizzard school of thought.

Weather broadcasters are allowed to be wrong -- a lot. (If an MLB umpire had the same accuracy rate, he'd be pilloried post-game in the parking lot.) They just aren't allowed to be vague. All or nothing, baby. Take your shot.

In the first of a series of winter weatherperson watching, The Pitch is proud to announce the most accurate forecast from the local news affiliates, based on yesterday's midday forecast for snow accumulation in the metro, as measured on my deck in midtown.

But first, here are the guesses:

• KCTV5's Gary Amble: 2-4 inches 
• KMBC's Joel Nichols (9 a.m. forecast) 1-2 inches; Erin Little 12 p.m. (no prediction)
  
• KSHB's Brett Anthony: 1-4 inches
• WDAF's Mike Thompson: less than 3 inches

A few folks were in the right neighborhood, but this week's win goes to Joel Nichols. Not only did he call it first, he called it right. There was 1.5 inches of snow on my back deck. Brett Anthony and Mike Thompson were in the right range, but no one could touch Nichols' precision.

OK, when's the next storm?

I could tell, from my apartment a block away, that John Frey's Christmas decor was worth a closer look. The light emanating from my Hyde Park neighbor didn't fit the traditional Santa-and-his-reindeer or Jesus-in-the-manger kind of set-up.

Carolyn Szczepanski

​Nope, Frey's holiday cheer is packaged inside some old washing machines -- bathed in red and green paint, draped with holiday lights and equipped with televisions showing holiday movies.

Historically, Frey hasn't been so adventurous, simply decking his house on Campbell Street with garden-variety Christmas bulbs. But about a month ago he decided to amp up his annual display -- and some lame-ass inflatable snowman didn't fit his vision.

"I kind of laugh when I see how big and outrageous the Christmas yard decorations have become," Frey says. "I tend to like modern interactive art pieces -- big fan of Museum of Modern Art in NYC -- and I wanted to kind of poke fun at the traditional idea of a Christmas yard decorations while still being holiday themed. The idea was to take items totally unrelated to Christmas and make them fit. Could have easily been a car on blocks painted green and red with televisions poking out the windows."

Thus far, the reaction from neighbors has been positive, but Frey knows his lawn installation might not be appreciated elsewhere in the region.

John Frey

​"I don't think this would be looked upon so favorably in the suburbs -- or even be legal," he says. "This is one of the many reasons living in Hyde Park and Midtown is so great."

I didn't catch the finale of The Amazing Race -- or any of this season -- but openly gay brothers from Liberty Sam and Dan McMillen -- SPOILER!!! -- finished second. ere they are saying they feel satisfied with the experience ... except for the whole not winning $1 million part.


Yeah, must suck. If you missed last night's show -- or any of this season -- here's the finale.

Kansas City weather was gorgeous over the long Thanksgiving weekend -- perfect for procrastinators who still hadn't gotten around to hanging their holiday lights. Unfortunately, it looked as if tragedy was about to strike at a house on the corner of State Line and West 61st Street:

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Jeez, had this guy's ladder really fallen out from under him? Was he really hanging for dear life from the gutter?
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Nah. Turns out whoever lives here was just enjoying some excellent holiday humor. We couldn't quite make out the exact wording of the sign on the ladder, but we think it says "Gotcha! He's fine. Merry X-mas."

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On a recent stop at the Valero on 17th and Grand, I noticed this sign on the beer cooler. I've never thought about taking one bottle of Miller High Life and trying to barter for it, but that happens so often at this gas station they needed to write declarations.

"All the time," said the woman at the cash register. "They pull one beer out of a six pack and bring it up and try to pay for it. Even with the signs up they try to do it, and we keep telling them no."

The logistics and need behind trying to buy only one bottle of beer fascinates me. Maybe more than it should.

"I don't know what they think a good price for one beer is because we tell them they can't buy it before they offer anything, and I can't ring it up," the cashier said. "Sometimes they do get mad when we tell them they can't have it."

If you were in a situation where buying one bottle of MGD at the downtown Valero seemed necessary, you'd be pissed off too.  

​Don't get hungry -- the cupcakes in the picture aren't edible. They're dissolving bath fizzies by Dirty Laundry, just one of the many local vendors showing off the goods tonight at the Ric Rac Roundup from 5-9 p.m. at Californos, 4124 Pennsylvania, in Westport.

Shop now and you'll get to sleep in on Black Friday.