Appeals court ponders nature of the Whizzinator

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A Missouri appeals court recently took up an interesting question: Does the use of a Whizzinator constitute forgery?

Robert Smothers of Moberly, Missouri, was subject to drug testing as a condition of his bond. Smothers was submitting a sample when a police officer administering the test heard a snapping noise. Asked about the suspicious ruckus, Smith allegedly admitted to using a Whizzinator device.

Randolph County charged Smothers with forgery and possession of forging instrumentality. Bogus, said Smith's lawyer, who argued that the state's forgery laws did not apply to urine samples. A circuit court agreed, and the charges were dismissed in 2008.

The prosecutor appealed, asserting that Smothers acted with a purpose to defraud.

Drive-by history: Holy Name Catholic Church and the MLK riots

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Holy Name Catholic Church at 23rd and Benton Ave.
If Kansas City kicked back on a shrink's couch for psychoanalysis, this church would definitely play a role in its most repressed, battle-scarred memories.

That's something I learned Tuesday night at a lecture by Dr. Jacob Wagner, a professor at UMKC who teaches Urban Planning and Design. In front of a diverse sprinkling of folks at the ScionLAB, Wagner discussed Kansas City's tendency to demolish important historical structures. He pressed us to consider the greater meaning behind which buildings are torn down, which buildings are saved, and what new structures are built in a city.

Wagner shared the history of the Holy Name Catholic Church building at 23rd Street and Benton Boulevard, which, miraculously, is still standing. I found the building's National Historic Register paperwork online, and it tells the same story:

PSA: Confessions of a wife beater

The victims of domestic violence live in a silent state of fear, isolation and intimidation until they get help. Here in Domestic Violence Awareness Month, the City Prosecutor's office wants the victims of abuse to reclaim their lives.

In an event Monday night at the Screenland Theater, about 75 people gathered for a public premiere of the city prosecutor's new anti-domestic violence video titled "Your Right. Your Life." Here's the abbreviated version:

The video's content was mostly what you'd expect, but with one new addition: the confessions of a recovered abuser.

In the video, an ex-convict identified as C.W. Riley detailed how he controlled and abused his domestic partner: "I put time and effort into thinking about how to control the other person so you know what works and what don't work," he said. "I thought it was my right to do that."

Riley described how jealousy and perceived slights escalated his behavior from pushing and shoving to outright hitting and beating and eventually a jail sentence. "I ain't proud," he admitted.

The path Riley took to prison is well worn. According to a 2005 study by the Department of Justice, female spouses account for 84 percent of domestic violence victims, and men accounted for 83 percent of spousal murderers. Fifty percent of spousal abuse offenders in state prison had killed their victims. A fact sheet from the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence shows 1 in 4 women will experience domestic violence in their lifetimes.

Despite the prevalence of justice programs, some women feel too ashamed or threatened to report the abuse against them. Said one woman in the video: "He would have been more accountable if I hadn't dropped the charges."

Assistant City Prosecutor Martha Means said the victims of domestic violence should report abuse at 816-468-5463.

Learn how to dodge bullets at St. Therese's tonight

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photo by Luke Echterling
Ron McMillan
Community activists Ron McMillan and Mark Porter are presenting a series of 10 personal-safety seminars they've titled, "Dodging Bullets." The first one is going down tonight at 6 at St. Therese's Little Flower Church at 5814 Euclid Avenue.

More than 2,000 shootings have been reported in Kansas City this year, McMillan says, but "as far as crime prevention, and actually helping people avoid these things, it's just not being done."

McMillan has created a presentation that includes police and military tactical procedures for literally dodging bullets, plus ways to recognize unsafe situations, ways to safeguard your home and car, and good personal safety habits to get into, like ensuring that someone knows your whereabouts at all times.

"Everyone wants to talk about snitching or not snitching, but we ain't even talkin' to each other about these things," McMillan says. "People walk around here like they're at Worlds of Fun when these are dangerous streets, there are home invasions, carjackings, drive-bys. I'm going to try to make some folks understand that we gotta talk about safety, and in talking about safety, we'll address our personal habits, our careless habits. You see kids out here on their cell phones all the time, but how many of them are talking about where they are, when they'll be home, about making a plan? We're not prepared for living in peace and nobody's teaching us any better."

What's especially scary, McMillan says, is when shooters aim into crowds of people, like the kind that congregate late at night after a party. "We create a lot of these situations," McMillan says.

Author goes to source of KC's yummy water

Elizabeth Royte writes about the chain of life. In 2005, she published a book, Garbage Land: On the Secret Trail of Trash, that followed the waste out of her Brooklyn home. Her most recent book examines a product brought in to millions of residences and offices: bottled water.

Americans consume 50 billion single-serve bottles of water a year. In
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Photo by Rod Morrison
Elizabeth Royte
Bottlemania: How Water Went on Sale and Why We Bought It, now in paperback, Royte describes how fashion, which once drove sales of bottled water, now threatens its growth. To some, toting a bottle of Evian is a social crime on par with driving a Hummer.

Much of Bottlemania is set in Fryeburg, Maine, a small town above a spring that Nestlé uses to produce Poland Spring. Royte also visited Kansas City, Missouri, and toured the city's water treatment plant, where engineers run the Big Muddy through an impressive array of filters and processes before it reaches our taps.

Of all the municipal water works in the country, why Kansas City's?
I wrote about KC's water because I wanted to compare it with New York City's water, which is famously tasty and comes from a fairly well protected watershed. Kansas City starts with water from a much dirtier source -- the Missouri River -- cleans it up, and also wins taste awards.

Shooting off fireworks in the boonies is still illegal, y'all

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Johnson County deputies don't want to see your children struggling to grasp your miserable stump of a hand after the Fourth of July, so they're enforcing the fireworks ban in JoCo all weekend.

"According to county regulations, fireworks, including sparklers, are illegal without a permit in all unincorporated areas of Johnson County" (emphasis MINE! ALL MINE!), according to Master Deputy Tom Erickson, the official holiday joy-dampener with the Johnson County Sheriff's office.(Fireworks remain illegal without a permit in the incorporated parts of the county, too.)

If you get busted buying or selling fireworks in JoCo, the fines can be between $25 (for the worst fireworks ever perhaps) up to $100 (yeah, baby, depleted uranium!!!).

For more information on all the fun-killing Johnson County has in store regarding fireworks, go here. To see a guy light his face on fire, go here.

Kansas City is responsible for new Johnny Depp gangster movie

This weekend the highly anticipated film Public Enemies opens. It's the story of outlaw John Dillinger and stars Johnny Depp and Christian Bale, so you know it'll probably

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make a shit-ton of cash. Plus, it was directed by Michael Mann, and that guy knows his way around cops and robbers and bullets (ahem, Heat, everyone?).

But without Kansas City, there'd be no badass shootouts to film.

I don't think it's a spoiler to tell you that John Dillinger was shot to death by federal agents as he was leaving a Chicago movie theater. That was 1934. The trailer for Public Enemies shows a lot of cool Tommy-gun action, so it's a safe bet that besides Dillinger's death, someone's going to be trading lead. And of course that's going to be a big part of the movie's fun.

Here's why Kansas City is important. FBI agents weren't actually allowed to carry guns or make arrests until the Kansas City Massacre in 1933 at Union Station. Beyond that, Agent Melvin Purvis - portrayed by Bale in the movie - went after gangster Pretty Boy Floyd because of Floyd's suspected involvement in the massacre.  

There you go. No KC, no Union Station? No FBI agents, no guns, no thrilling cinematic gunfights. You're welcome, America.

The More You Know: Stabbed in the face while sleepwalking edition

Hey, breaking up is never easy. Unless your girlfriend stabs you in the face while you were sleepwalking. Even if you peed in the closet -- even if you peed in her grandmother's ashes -- she doesn't have the right to stab you. Thank her for the ride to hospital, and then run for the ER. Just run. And don't return her calls when she leaves messages asking how you're doing after she stabbed you in the face while you were asleep. Oh, and conversely, don't stab someone to break up with them either.

The More You Know: Tire slashing edition

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Hey, if you see someone slashing tires on cop cars, call 911 ... unless you're the one slashing tires.


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