My August 8 post about the Josephine Collective’s reaction – well, at least one member’s MySpace-aired disgruntlement – to not winning an opening slot at the 96.5 the Buzz Beach Ball 3 concert has generated a shitstorm of comments. All of the name-calling, scene-bashing and misspelled-opinion-spewing that occurred both in Josephine’s defense and at its expense inspired one reader (who asked to be identified as Aaron August) to parody the Johnson County band in comic strip form.

"Tale of a True Rock ‘n’ Roll Band," which I received via MySpace mail yesterday, contains a few misspellings and grammatical errors of its own, as well as a few below-the-belt stabs at individual members of the band. (The Brokeback Mountain potshot taken at bass player and nice guy Colby Michael Logback is especially low.) But there’s a bit of genuine humor in there, too. Maybe Josephine singer Dillon Teague Devoe will see that, if he's able to stop taking himself so seriously for about 30 seconds. -- Crystal K. Wiebe

[Click to enlarge; download and re-open to view if necessary. Two more panels after the jump.]

More

Hundred Years War, with Ladyfinger (NE) and Attack on Uranus
Wednesday, August 29
The Record Bar
Better than: Having piping-hot Velveeta ladled into your pants.
By Jason Harper

The fairly new and not seriously conceived but seriously awesome Hundred Years War reminds me of the spoken-word monologue Nick Cave bellows on the opening track of Grinderman. It's called "Get It On," and at the opening, Cave manically yells: I got to get up to get down and start all over again!/Head on down to the basement and shout!/Kick all those white mice and black dogs out!/Kick those black dogs and baboons out!/Kick those baboons and other motherfuckers out!/And get it on! Get it on! "It is a lament for the messianic rock 'n roll hero," Cave says on the Web site, "and begins, of course, with a statement of intent."

Fucking. Sweet. (You won't hear the statement-of-intent album version of "Get It On" on Grinderman's MySpace, by the way. Go buy it.)

As Ashley Brown's article (linked above) confirms, the intent of the members of Hundred Years War -- all guys in their 30s who've been in and around bands in the midtown music core -- was to form a riff-metal band for the hell of it and see how far they could infiltrate Jim Kilroy's Metal Wars. What they've ended up with is a working, lumbering beast of a band that still doesn't take itself too seriously but rocks the fuck out.

Chris Wagner is HYW's badass bass player.

More

Because KC hearts the Boss, we thought we'd let you know that the first single from his upcoming record, Magic, which reunites Bruce with the E Street Band, is downloadable free on iTunes. It's called "Radio Nowhere," and it rocks. It's not cut out to be a classic, epic Springsteen burner, but it's a breath of fresh air after that great but really, really rustic Seeger business.

Follow this link to be redirected to the iTunes store. You'll need iTunes on your computer, obviously. And if you haven't downloaded it free yet, now's the time, champ.

Magic hits stores October 2.

Last night, after a relaxing, late-evening jaunt through Westport, starting with dinner at McCoy's and ending with drinks until last call at Dave's Stagecoach Inn -- and can I just add how cool it was to walk by and see people enjoying live blues at Blayney's and DJs on the Hurricane deck and bands inside the joint on a Tuesday night -- a visiting out-of-town buddy and I went back to my pad and fired up the YouTube ... as men do after a night of fraternal drinking and manly carrying-on.

I wanted to show mon ami this hysterically bizarre duet between French pop godfather Serge Gainsbourg and American voodoo bluesman Screamin' Jay Hawkins. It's them riffing on the song "Constipation Blues." Basically, Hawkins yelps, hoos and makes farting noises while Gainsbourg cracks up and mutters things in French.

My friend hadn't heard of Serge Gainsbourg, so we did a tour de VousTube that led to this video for Gainsbourg's classic "Je T'Aime...Moi Non Plus." G-bourg originally wrote and recorded the song with his lover Brigitte Bardot, but she didn't want him to release it. She was just in it for the hot sex, evidently. They broke up, and after hooking up with gorgeous English actress Jane Birkin, Gainsbourg recorded the song with her and released it. She's the babe in this video. German anthropologists are still at work studying how the goblinlike Gainsbourg got these stunning women.

Watching this video half-bored and fully drunk, my friend observed, "I took a couple of college French classes and never really learned anything, but I would venture that what's going on here is she's saying 'I love you. I'm really hot.' And he's saying, 'I have a jacket.'"

Just thought I'd share that with y'all. Salut. -- Harper

BY ANDY VIHSTADT

Meat is Murder

Beck dropped a “Timebomb” last Tuesday. The exclusive single isn’t a huge jump from The Information, but here’s to you, Beck, for not using it as a greedy excuse to release a greatest hits album; it’s certainly worthy of A-side status. Listen to it for free at Pitchfork, or fork over a buck to iTunes. Afterwards, head to You Ain't No Picasso for a free MP3 of Beck covering Of Montreal’s “Wraith Pinned to the Mist (and Other Games),” or as most of us know it, that annoying Outback Steakhouse jingle.

Shiny Pasty People

Sigur Ros recently announced its first documentary, Heima, which could easily double as Iceland’s next tourism campaign. Get your passport ready and watch the trailer here. The DVD will coincide with a Sigur Ros compilation double-album, Hvarf-Heim, which will include studio and unreleased acoustic tracks. Both are due in November. Until then, check out the band’s media page for a huge cache of free music.

Speaking of pale, white guys on film, R.E.M. is gearing up to release its upcoming performance CD/DVD, R.E.M. LIVE, on October 16. Preview it here.

Continue the fix after the jump.

More

Kansas City ex-rapper Joe Good might still be in Retirement City (where, with any luck, 50 Cent will be joining him next month) but his songs live on in Remixland. Here's a track mixed by DJ Kid Cut Up from Milwaukee that introduces Good's lyrics on "Money" from SoundsGood's Biscuits & Gravy, to the Kelly Rowland and Eve song, "Like This."

Download: "Get Money Like This"

Befriend: Kid Cut Up

-- Nadia Pflaum

P.S. The video for the original "Like This" is highly watchable.

-- Jason Harper

Atreyu, Evanescence and Korn
August 22, 2007
Verizon Wireless Amphitheater
Better than: The Jerry Springer Show
By Crystal K. Wiebe

I hauled out to Bonner Springs again last night. It was the second Wednesday in a row I’ve spent at the venerable Verizon Wireless Amphitheater. Last week was Warped Tour; last night was the Family Values Tour. I would have lazed out again and just offered photos from the experience, but I wasn’t allowed to bring my digital camera into the venue, “per Korn’s request,” said the bag checker/patron-pat-down lady at the entrance.

Because, you know, little point-and-shoot digital cameras pose a real threat to the band’s livelihood.

There was no use fighting it, so my boyfriend and I started all the way back across the endless desert of a parking lot to stow our camera. On the way, we encountered our first freak of the evening. He was kind of pudgy, with a skinny braid on either side of his head. Clearly intoxicated, he was dancing around the porta-potties, yelling “Krangle! Krangle!” into the face of anyone who walked by.

Hi, Im Jonathan. Gimme all ur cameraz, plz.

More

Thanks to local musicians' dogged use of MySpace, I've learned a couple of things already today.

1. It looks like the Last of the V8s are quitsville. Their profile headline says "Goodnight...," and the poster for their Pitch Awards Show performance (see here and here) had billed it as their last show ever. I talked to a member of the band two days after that show, and all I got from that conversation was that the band's future was uncertain.

But maybe it involves a lady lead vocalist?

V8s drummer Kriss Ward sent out the following bulletin this morning.

Subject: You or someone you know...

Body: could be the next female lead singing rocknroll superstar in Kansas City!

Disiples of primative rock are searching for a female lead vocalist!

If you've never heard of The Stooges, The Bellrays, The Sonics, The Animals, The MC5 or Hellacopters don't hit me back.

If you're hip, do it!

Wonder who, besides Kriss, these "disiples" are? Well, if they get a hard-charging neolithic rock band going with a badass chick out front, I'll pay to see that. Especially if the lady is someone new and not at all influenced by Karen O. Please? Thank you.

Lisa Kekaula of the Bellrays, aka What This City Needs

More

Bill over at the new local jazz blog Plastic Sax has written an open letter to the new director of American Jazz Museum. More importantly, the new director of the AMJ should read it. I can't believe they still haven't fixed those damn display cases!

I think Bill's onto something with that Sax Hero idea, but, at the same time, it is a little crazy. But why not? Sky's the limit. It's the American Jazz Museum. The museum of American jazz. Shouldn't there be interactive exhibits and stuff? Shouldn't there be things for kids to play with? Shouldn't there be drugs available for you to take that will make you feel like you can play the drums really crazy and good like Gene Krupa, and then a Drugged-Up Drum Hero game for you to play -- maybe like in a secret back room of the museum?

Hell, maybe that's exactly what museum administration does all day. No, I'm not alleging anything -- except that if they do take drugs and play drums all day, then I want to work there.

I've just been out in the heat a couple hours and need to lie down.

Speaking of which, it is still awfully hot outside. But listen up, kids. Don't you go and put a frozen chicken in your shirt. Greater men than you have died from that sort of thing. Don't fool around.

Download column author Andy Vihstadt trolls the Internet for new music like a junkie with a $200-a-day habit, so we figured since he's doing it anyway, we'll try and convince him to share his findings. He agreed. The man's a true public servant. Enjoy.

Porn Challenge

Canada’s answer to the supergroup returns on Tuesday with Challengers, marking the fourth notch on the New Pornographers’ collective bedpost. If you’re a superfan, go here to order "The Executive Edition" which comes as a box set, including three extra discs of bonus material. Or, if you’re a cheapskate, head over to Chromewaves to download Neko Case doing Stevie Nicks.

Shame on you. Alright, here's the link.

The New Pornograhers -- “Dreams (live Fleetwood Mac cover)”

Smells Like Cake

Scratch 'n sniff technology is grossly underused these days, so kudos to Cake for incorporating it into its limited-edition pressings of B-Sides and Rarities. Due in October and available in five scents (none of which will actually resemble cake), the compilation will deliver covers of songs by Barry White, Kenny Rogers and Black Sabbath.

Cake -- “War Pigs”

Fix continues after the jump.

More

Since the October demise of local favorite Doris Henson, the band's eccentric leader and primary power, Matt Dunehoo, moved to New York and has gotten deep into the beginnings of a new music project.

Meet Baby Teardrops.

Your homework for the weekend is to listen to the Baby Teardrops music player, which is loaded up with 10 lo-fi, homespun nuggets. Some of them sound like DH songs that never were ("Banged in the Heart," "I Don't Wanna Go Home, I Wanna Go Home" and the broke-ass epic "Still Singing the Same Songs"). Others sound like Syd Barrett was exhaling pink vapors into Dunehoo's mind when he was recording ("Why Is No One Knocking On My Door?" "Let It Roll"). Overall, very promising material.

Let us know what you think. The web site is totally weird, though, I mean, look at this main-page image:

Matt, are you OK?

Well, at least the music speaks well for itself.

Another Oddball Solo-Man NYC Baby-Named Project for Baby Teardrops to be Friends With: Baby Dayliner

Warped Tour
August 15, 2007
Verizon Wireless Amphitheater
Better than: Going to school.

The Warped Tour came to Verizon yesterday. Crystal K. Wiebe braved the heat and teenagers to catch some bands and snap some photos. It was just too hot for much else. Fortunately, unlike Meursault in Camus' The Stranger, the heat did not prompt her to kill anyone in an act of soulless nonchalance.

Don't know who was drawing this huge (not) crowd, but evidently all the cool kids were out back, getting baked in the parking lot.

More

The Wayward Son dropped by Casa de Lethal last Monday, interviewed the razor-witted rapper, and left with the new single from Mac's long-awaited Rhymesayers debut album, 11:11, which is scheduled for an October 9 release. This shit's on FIRE. And it comes with two unreleased songs. And it was a really fun interview. Mac Lethal is one interesting cat.

Download it as an MP3

Or grab it off the RSS page.

Tracks:

"There's Been A Murder," instrumental (unreleased)

"Mean Jab" (unreleased)

"Make-Out Bandit," new single from upcoming album 11:11

"Mallory Knox" (unreleased)

If you couldn't tell from the photos recently posted here, the Pitch Music Awards Ceremony last Friday at the Uptown was wilder than a busful of hyenas fighting over a hamloaf. Much of the proceedings were like a session of British Parliament, but with constant (not merely frequent) hooing and heckling from the audience. Peep these videos shot by our intrepid shutterbug Anna-Marie Perry.

First off, some footage of the Snuff Jizz (Snuff Jazz + Street Jizz/Ssion) performance that blew most folks away.

More

I guess we should let you know who won, huh?

Alright, here's the list, but first you have to look at the self-proclaimed King of Kansas City, Brodie Rush, the awards show host.

Best Male Vocalist: Brandon Phillips (the Architects); Best Female Vocalist: Kim Anderson (Flee the Seen); Best Blues/Soul: Ida McBeth; Best Jazz: the Grand Marquis; Best Country/Bluegrass: Split Lip Rayfield; Best Pop: It’s Over; Best Latin: Son Venezuela; Best Punk: Flee the Seen; Best Avant/Experimental: Onemilliontinytinyjesuses; Best Hardcore/Metal: the Esoteric; Best Folk/Roots: In the Pines; Best DJ/Hip-Hop: DJ Sku; Best DJ/Dance: Nomathmatics; Best Live Act: the Architects; Best Hip-Hop: Mac Lethal; Best Rock: the Architects; Best New Act: the Sex Police.

And so the people have chosen.

More photos after the jump.

More